Archive for October, 2016

Definitions

Posted: October 29, 2016 in hidden admonishment

I have identified and defined many features about myself in the past few years that I had previously, quite deliberately, left nebulous through my formative years:

  1.  I am not an open minded individual.  I may be extremely tolerant of others retaining their own points of view, but I am not generally accepting of those differing vastly from my own.  I filter information through a personal bias and internally judge and dismiss the actions and diatribes of others based on my own thoughts and views.  That being said, I consider myself relatively respectful towards others…or at the very least, when intolerant, I make a genuine attempt to remain passive (apathetic).
  2. I am an atheist.  I have made every good faith attempt possible for me to entertain the validity of a majority of the world’s monotheistic and polytheistic religious structures as well as many theories (not used in the scientific context of the word) pertaining to more generalized omnipotence, and I cannot make the leap.  I have stopped trying, although I do still read into many facets of spirituality that I find myself ignorant of beforehand.  For a long time, I knew that I lacked the capacity to make any sort of personal engagement but still considered my respect for others who can and have found faith as an indication of agnosticism, but it is not.  I am not.  I am an atheist.  I admit that I was wrong when claiming to be agnostic.
  3. I am straight.  Even though I’ve had considerably more sexual encounters with women than with men, and find the female form much more sexually pleasing to look at than the male form, I don’t like women.  At all.  I’m actually extremely predatory towards women, do not retain female friendships, and have only sustained one relationship with a woman a long time ago…which was not overtly sexual, nor well defined as committed.  I only allow myself to be emotionally vulnerable with men, have only been in dedicated relationships with men, and even though I’m easily sexually aroused by women, only psychologically desperately crave cock.  Due to the creeping intensity of violence I display sexually towards women, and a general move towards a more stable relationship structure, my husband and I have agreed to close this chapter.  I am not bisexual, I am not polyamorous, and I have not been coerced in any fashion whatsoever into making this delineation.  I am a very common variety, comfortably reformed, monogamous straight girl with some dangerous anger issues.
  4. I have no desire to procreate.  None.  Cum inside me?  Yes.  Love the sensation.  Brutalize my pussy?  Absolutely.  Couldn’t live happily without some pain.  Bear and raise offspring?  Not on your life.  People always told me I’d change my mind.  People still tell me I’ll change my mind.  No.  I won’t.  I gave myself a very comfortable duration of time to consider it.  If the desire surfaced, and I wasn’t in a suitable relationship, I went as far as to identify someone with an attractive genetic makeup and discussed with him my intentions to use him for the express purpose of creating a baby.  The desire didn’t and hasn’t surfaced, and I’ve passed on a few potentially healthy relationships because of my lack of interest.
  5. I am not my job, and separating myself from my profession gets easier every day.

Bailey

Posted: October 29, 2016 in hidden admonishment
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She’s worth it.