minions

Posted: September 30, 2011 in hidden admonishment
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I don’t tell my underlings to correct things that they do wrong.
I quietly fill in the gaps and move on.

I have two.
Two minions.
I like them.
If I were to bother to correct them, they would listen.
Sometimes, if it’s important, I’ll let them know.
It took over a year and half a dozen furious rejections to find two that I can stand.

If you think they’re doing something wrong, you fucking tell them.
If you take my bonus, I will break shit and be all around unpleasant to work with.
If you upset my minions…if you upset them too often for trivial shit…they’ll leave.

No.

Best leave them alone.
They’re pretty.
They’re nice.
They fuck shit up sometimes.

I’m okay with that.

Why don’t you listen to me, the way my minions did?
Now, I’m down to one.

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